You've gone and done it — you've spoiled the day with a spill. Both humans and domesticated fish alike worry themselves silly over spilling. A brief moment occurs for all humans when we spill. It's performed in slow motion, and we understand what is happening, as it happens, but remain powerless nevertheless. The cup falls. The jar slides.
Read MoreParking Lot Dumpster Squirrels
There is life in my parking lot. Which is to say, things are happening. The squirrels live in a tiny little park nearby and they eat in the dumpsters. These furry, grey animals are largish and bushy-tailed, maybe a bit more worn than say a suburban squirrel.
Read MoreI May Be In A Prime Position to Purchase Real Estate in Belize
The answer is Yes. I do need a vacation home. The only trouble is I need more vacation time and a much much higher vacation home budget, which is presently sitting flat at around zero. Maybe the sender misjudged my financial status by a rung or two or hundred dozen. Maybe I CAN purchase a vacation home with nothing but a few bucks and a couple years worth of belly lint.
Read More'Tis the Season to Accidentally Eat a Thousand Cookies
The true home of the cookie is, of course, the belly. The human belly. We are the only species capable of ingesting large, mostly irrational, and potentially hazardous amounts of sugar, at least intentionally. There is no willpower when it comes to cookies.
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